One tequila. Two tequila. Three tequila. Floor.
Check the mini-bar. The champagne is missing, we’re in trouble. It’s a stripper’s energy drink.
I can tell that you been cryin’ all night, drinkin’ all summer, prayin’ for your happiness, hope that you recover.
If Facebook ruins relationships, then guns kill people, pencils misspell words, cars make people drive drunk and spoons make you fat. Don’t blame the means that a person uses for how the PERSON chooses to use it. Take responsibility for YOURSELF.
I’m not some drunk sorority chick, you can’t ROOFIE me.
I am going to drink until someone is hot enough to make out with.
Last year I was hung over until Thanksgiving.
Ciroc and Sprite on a private flight, bitch I been tight since Guiding Light.
Don’t go to a sex store tipsy.
I can drink eight beers and feel fine the next day. I usually drink dark beer because I hate hangovers, and I can’t drink and work in the same schedule.